Swear I was on a loser to start with. Thursdays I’ve the Jobstart placement, an industrial estate in the arse of nowhere. I’d forgotten to take Alanna's present with me that morning. So, by the time I clocked off and legged it back to Jed’s flat, it was near enough four, too late to head over for the party. Siobhan would be slicing the cake and handing out party bags. But not only that, I’d promised Alanna a rocking horse from Toy World — big talk one time I was winning — now I could just see Siobhan and her sisters all lined up, a big wall of no sound, and me skulking in with this pathetic substitute, a Barbie doll and Horse. Some surprise.
It was still rolled up in my sleeping bag, behind Jed’s sofa. I lifted the lightweight box and spotted a crack in the plastic.
‘Fucksake, should’ve had it wrapped. She’ll have a heap of presents already.’
Jed rolled his eyes at my rant.
‘Calm down, Trap 4. Have a smoke. Take it later when all the heavies have gone.’
He was sat on a beanbag with Grey, asleep on his knee. He crunched forward, his lanky legs anchored to the floor, and reached for the bag of grass. He rolled, of course, being the man with the stash, used his Big Book of Nothing to work on. Grey peered out from below looking a wee bit miffed as if it was me leaning a book on her resting place. Cats have that way of making you feel even more like shite than you already do.
The first few drags got me swimmy headed: smoking on an empty belly since a bacon bap at ten. Jed got us into one of those meandering conversations you’d be scratching your head over the next day. The Barbie and Horse caught my eye every few minutes. Her plastic smile was laughing at me. Jed reckoned she’d necked a few disco biscuits.
I bet Jed there was no way he could roll a joint one-handed.
‘You sure about that?’ He raised his eyebrows then they collapsed. ‘Is this some weird therapy?’
‘Go on, it’s not like a real bet if it’s only words.’
‘Aye, well. On your head be it.’